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The Catechism of Corporate Cliché (With sincere apologies to Myles na gCopaleen)




cat·e·chism/ˈkatəˌkizəm/: Noun: 1. A summary of the principles of Christian religion in the form of questions and answers, used for the instruction of Christians.
2. A series of fixed questions, answers, or precepts used for instruction in other situations.

As a matter of observational truism, in which direction should all proceedings ideally be going?
Forward

How does one characterise an attitudinal change in a paradigm’s position?
It shifts

When testing the metaphorically vehicular veracity of a proposition, which component must be kicked?
The tyres
                                                                                                                                              
As a matter of corporate orthodoxy, where are employees exhorted to think with regards to the box?
Outside it.

When thinking outside the box, what colour is the sky?
Blue

If expectations are neither great nor met, how are they treated?
They are managed

When managing the expectations of employees with no promotional prospects, which items of a dead man’s wardrobe are offered by managers in impotent consolation?
His shoes

When agreement has been reached on an issue and successfully managed to the meeting agenda, to which level are discussions normally taken?
The next one

Down which putative thoroughfare should the can of collegiate procrastination be kicked?
The road

As an obfuscatory alternative to kicking it down the road, where else could said can be dispatched?
Into the long grass

When engaging in blue-sky thinking, in which direction does one drill to reach the heart of a concept?
Down

Which carboniferous visage typically characterises the nexus between an idea and  its implementation?
The coal face

What happens to concepts at a meeting when they are overtaken by more attractive ideas?
They are parked

When all parties are in understanding and agreement, from which familiar ecclesiastical pamphlet is everyone said to take their singing cues?
The same hymn sheet

As a matter of observational truism, at what point during the day are most arguments summed up?
The end 

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