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Disabled to moonlight as shopping trolleys

Stop her, she's got my loyalty card...
Britmanistan’s High Chancellor Tarquin ‘Call me Dave’ Poncenby-Smythe has unveiled new plans to help the differently-abled to earn their disability payments.
The new initiative, unveiled in conjunction with Tat-co, the country’s biggest retailer, will see mobility scooter-users employed as interactive shopping trolleys nationwide.
The pilot scheme has been running successfully at an undisclosed safe and leafy borough and will now be 'rolled out' to Tat-co shops nationwide.
Britmanistan, a small corrupt kingdom on the European periphery, is currently being ruled in a coalition of National unity between the ‘On your bike’ (OYB) and the ‘Terribly nice’(TN) parties.
High Chancellor: Tarquin
‘Call me Dave’ Poncenby-Smythe
The OYB has long been an advocate of greater efficiency and choice within the disability sector.
“The disabled have consistently underperformed as a consumer demographic and their position as net consumers of resources is untenable,” Poncenby-Smythe told reporters as he opened a Tat-co 24 store at a Royal Palace in the Capital this morning.
The Terribly Nice response has been upbeat: “They probably won't like it at first but at least it gets them out of the house,” offered TN party leader Tarquin ‘Call me Keith’ Smythe-Poncenby.
“We got the idea from watching documemntaries on the History Channel,” continued the High Chancellor. “The touchy feely people out there will probably say we should be paying them the minimum wage, but this is a society of choices. They can choose between working like donkeys for Tat-co or they can choose to have their benefits cut and their scooters clamped.”
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