Army unveils new austerity uniform

Shitzkrieg: Paddi-Army in its Emergency glory days

Swingeing cuts to the defence budget have been included in the latest diktat from the Supreme Leader (aka.‘An Taoiseach’) of the Fenian Failure junta currently running South Paddistan (a small, corrupt theocracy on the periphery of Europe).

The new uniforms (actually very old ones taken out of storage after nearly 60 years in mothballs), complete with distinctive coal-scuttle helmet, were apparently bought at knockdown prices from the German Weimar Republic in the early 1930s. ‘An Taoiseach’, speaking from a bunker in Leinster House, exhorted his troops to wear the old Emergency uniforms with pride.

Some doubts had initially been expressed by the rank and file over the extent of the Defence budget cuts as the likelihood of civil unrest increased.

Dissent was quickly quelled however when the government reminded the army that they could be wearing red noses and floppy shoes and still the people of Paddistan wouldn’t defy the will of their glorious and supreme leader.

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